Love Across Boundaries

--- Cat Thomas & Courtney Donovan Smith Translated by Shanzi chen

Jenny Liu (ROC) and Alan Pontes (South Africa). Married: 5 years.

They met in Vibe. Alan was dancing, looked around "and there she was, those eyes, almost like she knew me.....I went straight over and we danced close for hours."
Their first date was in a Japanese teahouse. "We talked for hours, I liked her straightaway," he said. Jenny and her friends sat up all night going over the details.

Alan proposed in a taxi. "We were hiking, and got lost. Jenny never complained. She sung while we tried to find our way out of the forest. We found a road and a taxi after many hours of slogging. I glanced over at her while we on our way home, and realized I had not or probably would never meet a nicer person. So I asked her to marry me. No planning, just right there on the spot. She said yes, immediately."
Any tips? "Have faith in one another. Jenny has stuck by me through some difficult times. I could not have asked for a better wife."

Stefan (Swiss) and Leah (American). Married: 3 years.

They've lived in Taipei for seven years and married three years ago in the courthouse in ShiLin. They met on Mindoro Island in the Philippines in 1997, at Stefan's birthday party. A group of about 10 people set out on boats loaded with food and drink and ended up sunburnt.

Stefan proposed to Leah after five years, at 3,560 meters on a glacier in the middle of a steep field of snow in Switzerland. They had a bottle of champagne on a table made with a snowboard, which warmed up their bodies, but they soon got cold and had a laugh, trying to snowboard down the valley and falling over frequently. Luckily the slopes weren't policed! They speak their own language, a mixture of Swiss German, Chinese and English. They have two kids; Damien, three years old, and Jasmine, 11 months. Success is...having the kids in bed by eight o'clock and enjoying a glass of wine in peace and quiet.

Nina (ROC) and Andy (India). Married: 3 years.

They met when Nina was studying English. Andy was her English tutor's friend. Their first date was in a coffee shop and then an outing to Chiang Kai-Shek Memorial Hall-although Nina didn't realize it was a first date! In fact, it was only after a few months, when they celebrated her birthday together and Andy gave her a special gift-a gold ring with a lover's inscription on it-that Nina realized that this was something different!
They got married in Changhua three years ago, after having known each other for a year, and set up their restaurant, Out of India, together two years later.

They communicate in a mixture of English and Mandarin -- often both languages in the same sentence. Nina says the key to their success is taking the time to understand each other's country and family. Luckily, she's found that Andy's family has very similar values to her own.

Joanne (Canadian/Taiwanese) and Adam (British). Married: less than one year.

Adam and Joanne met on Joanne's birthday, and more formally through mutual friends soon after. Adam describes their first "half date" as an evening at Taichung's now-defunct Napoli pub with friends, but they soon found themselves having a quiet drink together. Joanne adds, "Our first real date happened soon afterwards. I went round to Adam's apartment where we hung out, chatted, watched a terrible movie and had our first fight-a pillow fight. Need I go further?" The proposal came at a high-end restaurant in Taichung. They frequently tease each other about the differences between British and Canadian English. Adam, while noting his own English has been "Canadianized", notes that, "Joanne has also picked up a few British language habits. She now says 'bloody hell' which quite possibly could be a somewhat negative reflection of my language, although it does give me a little pride." To which Joanne replied, "Bloody hell, yes!"

Joanne attributes their success to this: "Generally speaking, COMMUNICATION is key. Don't go to bed angry. If it bothers you, discuss it right away -- keep your friends and go out individually by yourselves." Adam adds, "As far as cultural differences, make an effort with the parents and family (same goes for any marriage)!"